In this revealing and deeply human conversation, Alan Webber shares the extraordinary evolution of his life from bouncing through over 40 jobs in 20 years to finding his true calling as a therapist at the age of 42. A cousin of co-host Stan, Alan’s story is filled with humor, grit, and self-discovery as he opens up about growing up in Boston, navigating career chaos, and ultimately building a life grounded in meaning and mental wellness. If you’ve ever wondered whether it’s “too late” to change direction, this episode proves otherwise.
Key topics discussed:
A bumpy road to purpose:
- Alan candidly shares his “20-year flounder phase,” cycling through dozens of jobs, from department store manager to pharmaceutical sales.
- He opens up about how therapy (as a client) saved him, and how it led to his transformation into a licensed therapist
REBT and a different way to heal:
- Alan explains Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT), a powerful cognitive therapy approach focused on replacing irrational thoughts with rational ones.
- He discusses the importance of personal accountability in emotions: “You generate your own feelings, no one else.”
From burnout to breakthrough:
- At age 40, Alan left a well-paying sales job to go back to school full-time, earning both a bachelor’s and master’s degree in just 36 months.
- He and his third wife adopted a child, and Alan reflects on how his childhood trauma shaped his views on fatherhood and what he’d do differently.
Modern mental health meets old-school therapy:
- Why Alan prefers direct, actionable coaching over traditional talk therapy
- The growing mental health crisis among youth and the therapist shortage in today’s world.
Marriage, mentorship, and meaning:
- Alan shares the story of meeting his third wife via old-school dating ads complete with a 40-copy mass-mailed letter.
- Now 77, he continues practicing therapy full-time and encourages others to value process over perfection.
Memorable quotes:
“You generate your own feelings, no matter what anyone says or does.” – Alan Webber
“Failure isn’t the end. It’s a chance to learn and try again.” – Alan Webber
“It took me 20 years to find myself. And I’d do it all over again.” – Alan Webber
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Where to listen & watch:
🎥 YouTube: https://youtu.be/XZ_39gcHt7Q
🎧 Apple Podcasts: https://tinyurl.com/mtkxjcez
🎧 Spotify: https://tinyurl.com/yhkw24v7
🎧 Amazon Music: https://tinyurl.com/2hnfynpm
Connect with Alan:
Website: https://www.psychologytoday.com/profile/820525
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